Poems by Carlton Carr

Bareback

he fucks

like a scorpion
there is a sting
in his tail
a tale of abuse
on the silver tongue
that licks me

unprotected
i am at the mercy
of his history
and the odds
are not great

there is death
in his eyes
as he slides about
me

i shed my skin
and he wraps
my bloody
nakedness
within himself

is it love
is it hate
his secret mission

(he tells me nothing)

is it grateful
the screaming
of pain and submission

(still he tells me nothing)

perhaps there is nothing to tell

 

The Serious Moonlight

i am a lover
of the serious moonlight
the solemn pleasure
of the rose
and the ugly criticism
of the early morning light
that makes me doubt
my frivolous existence

i love
not only the pretty things
the sparkling baubles
of your occasional kisses
the soft seductive touches
of your eyes
i love too
your lies

it’s twisted i know
but when you lie to me
i think that you still care
enough to hide the truth
it is your youth
that bruises my age
your rotting love
that abuses me

 

The Unfinished Conversation

ONE

there are shadows that gather
in the corners of my room at night
dripping sparkling drops of poison
into the dream

i try to climb out
but the unfinished conversation
keeps me there

TWO

i said
‘where all sorrows end
i will open a window for you
and hold your hand
as we fall’

you said
‘i have jumped a thousand times
but still I am here’

i said
‘that is so sad’

THREE

you said
‘you are drowning in your psyche
and cannot see the joy
and beauty
that lives around you’

i said
‘in my darkest night I heard you call my name
and the sound of your voice
was a rainbow
i could use
to climb back to your arms
again’

you said
‘come to me
and I will help you
sweep away the cobwebs
of your past
and shower you with light’

i said
‘please don’t let me drift away
i could never anchor
without your voice and light’

you said
‘that will never happen’

i said
‘i don’t want to let you near
for fear you might lose yourself
trying to save me’

FOUR

…then you are there
in the dark doorway
of the dream

we float out together
sucked into the swirling stars
into that dark night

 
Miracles

i fell upon thorns
and you picked the flowers
that sprang from my wounds
and made a garland
for your hair

i walked on water
and you reached out
your hand
and saved me
from drowning

i laced my soul
through yours
until i could
no longer
pull away

all these miracles;
the birth and death
of a thousand days
i performed them
for you

and still you crucify me

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